I want my Scorpio man back!

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Scorpio and Cancer in love?

I’ve been talking to this Scorpio guy for 5 months. At the beginning he showed a strong interest. As time went on I began to show a strong interest in him. Then, that’s when he started to pull away. Just recently he hit me with the “let’s just remain friends.”  He stated that he can’t give me what I want —  that is, a relationship — and he’s not ready to make that type of commitment.

 

I asked him was he seeing someone else. He said he is interested in dating other people. So with relief, I said “Ok that’s fine. He replied, “So you’re OK with that???” I said, “Yes, I don’t have a choice but to be Ok, I can’t make u like me.” “I do like u!”he said. “So, what’s the problem, was it the sex???”, I asked. He said, “No, and to be honest you were the best I ever had!”

 

So then I asked, “So, u don’t like hanging with me??” He responded, “Yes I do like being with u.” I told him to not give his heart away to anyone else, and he said I don’t have to worry about that. Then, he asked me not to have sex with anyone else! That we will continue to see each other, but we can date other people.

 

Please help, I’m totally confused with this one —  and he calls me crazy! LOL SMH my birthday is June 27 and his is November 6. We aren’t talking right now bcuz the next day he texted me “Hey, just thinking about u,”  That night I see him out with a girl, but he did speak to me and bought me a drink and danced with me.

 

The following night I see him out with a different girl, and he kisses me (with tongue) lol and buys me a drink. I asked him to walk me to my car and as we were leaving out, his date calls him over and he never returned to me. I can see in his face that he was irritated by her or something she said. Well anyway I text him that night telling him I don’t compete with no-one b!&* and eff him and his friendship. He told me he doesn’t owe me anything and called me crazy. I replied and apologize saying I could have used a better choice of words, and I asked him why was he running from me, running from us. He never responded and this was over a week ago. I miss him so much :-(

— Nicole

Dear Sweet, Naive Nicole:

Stop missing him — and you better not be saving yourself for him as he requested. You are being used — royally. There’s just no other way to say it.

 

I like the Cancer woman-Scorpio man dynamic, but he’s in player mode, apparently juggling at least three women, if not more.

 

As a Cancer woman you are too sensitive to even try to tangle with this disrespectful Casanova. Did he really try to French kiss you while he was out with other woman. Wow — he’s really smooth, bold and way too good at the game of manipulation to be straightened out by you. Some woman might set him on the path to loyalty and monogamy, but it will be someone with as much guile and manipulative psychology as he has.

 

Some Scorpios can handle receiving the intense interest they give out — particularly when they are mature and genuinely want a relationship. However, because many Scorpios love the chase and often want to be the only intense person in a bond, showing extreme interest can backfire.  If Scorpios know they have you hooked, often they’ll move on, hunting their next prey.  He was honest with you when he said he wasn’t ready for the type of commitment a Cancer girl needs.

 

Telling him that you were “OK” with him seeing other people further lowered your stock and value in his eyes. That’s why he replied “You’re OK with that?” Scorpios believe in lovers as territory; they value jealousy. Wanting someone to be yours exclusively is a sign of self-respect. For you not to care or be jealous that he’s showing interest in someone else is a flaw in his eyes and makes it clear that he can trifle with you because you won’t demand limits.

 

For you to ask him to not give his heart away after he has told you he will see other people and not commit to you was an additional faux pas. Don’t beat yourself up about it, but if you plan to date a Scorpio again, set limits for what you will and will not allow. Scorpios do not like malleable people who will bend to every wish and let them get away with relationship violations.  Stand up for yourself! Defend your dignity! I mean you had sex with this person. IF I were you, I would have one last conversation with this boy: tell him you expected more of him and that you’re not impressed with his need to disrespect women. Tell him you will not wait for him and that you will indeed have sex with someone else: a real man who respects you and knows how to commit to you.

 

If in fact the sex with you was “the best” he’s had as he claims, that will rattle him to the core. Otherwise, that “best” comment was simply to reel you in and keep you a pawn in the game — just like those “thinking about you” texts.

 

I have to say you were on the right track when you texted him that you don’t compete. The profanity was a nice touch, because Scorpios appreciate the drama and emotion of the profane. :-)   However, girl, you retreated too quickly. You should have stood your ground and told him HE was the crazy one. Instead, you apologized.

 

I know you miss him, but right now he’s not yours. If you want to make him yours, arrange to be seen out and in his habitat (preferably with male companionship)  and completely ignore him. If he decides to pursue you again, never compromise your dignity or apologize for standing up for yourself.

— Synthia Rose, ScorpioLand

READ MORE about Scorpio & Cancer compatibility

17 Comments

  1. ‘m in a sex relationship with a Scorpio guy!! He even treats me Lyk his best buddy hence he shares most of d things with me… Wn I had begin to have my relation with him I didn’t feel Lyk going on with other guys even though guys fall for me i never bother about other guys. ‘m a model usually i find other models as flirts but d day i got into relation with him i juz quit my flirty nature, i explained him everything infact I don’t hide anything from him he very well knows that… He flirts with other females I don’t like that part of him but still I adjust a lot. May b dese days he dont flirt much. We both are pissed with love relations because of our past so v’re having a sex relation instead!! I can clearly explain dat v got so many relations within us like frnz, fun, luv n sex relationship within us. I juz luv what’s going on… But I really wish him to stay more closer to me :( He shows his anger to me directly and later on he ll b fine. Wn eva he scolds me i juz enjoy that moment and i try consoling him. ‘m a Gemini female I knw Gemini Neva fits to scorpionian still I juz don’t feel like lvin him neither he don’t feel like lvin me. I mostly understand him even though If he hides stuffs or things with me… As a Gemini girl ‘m a moody person but den I hide my moody nature with him dis Is d only thing I hide from him, coz I knw he gets annoyed coz of such a nature… ” ‘m actually confused wdr he loves me or no and ‘m confused within myself how to behave with him ??? “

  2. I have been talking to a younger scorpio guy for about 7 months. We have a very complicated situation! I work with him first of all and actually am now his boss which is against the rules. So we have to keep it a secret obviously. Second i have a daughter with another guy and was with the other guy until april, i had already been talking to my scorpio for about 4 months. We just talked but alot at first, he txt me every single day good mornin and good nite always. Then when my daughters father and i broke up, the scorpio guy started coming around at night to actually hangout with me. I didnt want him to come around my daughter at first. We didnt hae sex right away but there always was soo much tension insane amounts of sexual tension. Im a gemini btw :) we started having sex and it was amazing better in ways that my 7 year relationship with the father ever was. I told him not to fall for me in the beginning becuz i didnt want to hurt him. Now 3 months later, after seeing each other on a regular basis having amazing sex :) and he even met my daughter! I asked him to define the relationship. He said he didnt want a relationship, but didnt want to see anyone else and also didnt want me to see anyone else. We were basically in a relationship but no offical commitment. I have fallen in love with him and i cant accept this half and half i want all or nothing, which i thought was a scorpio quality. Anyway, i did actually tell him i fell for him couldnt bring myself to say “i love you” and he told me he didnt feel the same. I appreciate the honesty. But then he txts me and wants to talk and be friends and says he misses me! He said he was falling back then but i told himmnot to so he didnt. And thats just how he feels i dont know what to do becuz i have to see him and i still have feelings. Hes on and off now its confusing me :( sorry this is so long! Please help

    • Update: i told him i couldnt be friends with him and needed to stop talking to him so incould move on and let him go. I was very honest about my feelings becuz i didnt want regrets becuz i held back in anyway, and i was heartbroken and exposed. We didnt talk for maybe a day or two and then i sent him a random txt just saying something about work and he broke down and said he did want to be with me he asked me to be his girlfriend :) by me cutting him off he had time to realize what he wanted and he decided he was ready to commit. Maybe this will help a girl who is crazy in love with a scorpio who wont open up to her. Put your feelings on the table and step back and let him choose. You wont make him do anything he doesnt want to but sometimes theyre not willing to be exposed unless they know younfeel the same way they do. He also told me he loves me! Be brave and willing to put your feelings out there and it might be well worth the risk

  3. Nicole, this Scorpio man is too indecisive and immature for you to consider having a relationship with. Dump Him!

    Not ALL Scorpio men are like this, and you ran into “bad luck” with this one. Scorpios can play mind games, and you shouldn’t tolerate it!

  4. Hi :-) I just wanna say thank you Cynthia Rose for the advice. Here is an update….My Scorpio and I are doing great! I stopped accepting the BS, stopped apologizing for things if it wasn’t my fault, and I would at times just sit back and let him chase me. I kept it balanced, to give him the space and opportunity to love me and to be in love with me. We have slow things down which has brought us closer. He has been freely opening up to me with his feelings, his fears, his job, family, etc. We are so much more intuned with each other and it gets greater each day. I know that he is at a point where he doesn’t want to lose me, and that lets me know he won’t be going anywhere anytime soon. I don’t try and make him jealous but I don’t let him get too comfortable either. He loves that aura of feminite mystery about me, in which I didn’t know that I had until now. I learned that once I stopped holding things back as far as setting him straight when he was wrong, he gained a lot of respect for me. Well anyway like I said we are doing GREAT and moving towards FANTASTIC :-) I will keep you all posted God Bless

  5. Three months of communication issues! He says I’m a pain in the rear, but overall good vibes. We’ve both been concerned about butting heads since practically day one. Every other week he says ” Maybe we shouldn’t see each other”, but still we have. First it was the silence between seeing each other once or twice a week. Now I think I havent been on a proper date because he fears I’ll argue w him in public. He’ll make plans but then nothing, just hang out. He admitted he does feel anxious as the night before we meet approaches. The 2nd time we met I freaked out over the sexual energy and left even when he pleaded for me to stay and tried to assure me we wouldnt go all the way. It took some pleading and explaining for him to see me again.. To try and keep this short. We both go through periods of celibacy, I don’t want to commit to the wrong person again. He knows what it would take for me to commit. When I didn’t like certain behaviour I reminded him I was “lonely not desperate” . He says he’s not looking for anything serious, but I get those tests still. Last week he fell through again saying something came up that he has to leave for his commute earlier expected but wanted to know if I was still coming by the office. Not surprised but seething I reply: bummer. He says What do you mean bummer? You supposed to be here at 5. I reply: I thought we’d have a few hrs together but I understand its a work. After speaking to him in person I come back at 5. He’s on the phone and begins rubbing my achey spots and giving me kisses where I like. I feel a lil uneasy and after the work call I ask him again if he is just trying to make me his office fling.. He says “oh ish this isn’t going to go well” he reminds me we haven’t had sex, I’m the only lady he talks to and that there is no revolving door. I try to check my insecurity and p/up where we left off but he was pissed saying just like in his past the kisses will lose passion and that I’ll pretend to be into pleasuring him and then change up. I chill in another room then try to reapproach but to no avail. I tell him this is not what intended to happen as I say goodbye…If you walk out the door! I ask him why stay and argue if nothing will be resolved. I cry, he comes comfort me and then says”You really are feelin me” We speak calmly for 30 min he gives me the best kiss ever. Two days later I have a bump on my lip I ask if he’s ever had a cold sore. No response. It wasn’t a cold sore. I ask a few days later what time can we meet . He says ” I think we should just leave things where there at” He talks to me for another 30 min saying that he likes me but he’s not going to date anyone right now. I told him and texted him I get frustrated from arguing too but I feel like we get closer. I also pointed out our issues w each other doesn’t really have to do w each other but w ppl from our past.

    Please help me reconnect w him. 04/17/82 & 11/13/80

    • Hey to everyone that wrote their story on my post seeking advice from Synthia, u have to make your own seperate post in order for her to respond to u. Now if u have a comment u would like to share in reference to my post or some advice, I would love to hear it. Thanks

      • hey nicole. i have the same issue. i retreated quickly after i told him off. hes mad and said he wasnt interested im talking at this point. We havent talked i 4 days. I texted once no reply. How do i get him back? Do i text him that im sorry or that im done with the games? help please! Doesnt help that girls are all over his ass bcuz were not talking :/

        • Hey Mayra,

          I know its months later with my response, sorry. Before I say anything or give any advice, how is it going with your situation?

  6. i am thanking the great man called prophetjakula who help me and cast a love spell on my ex boy, we were in love for more than a year. two days to our marriage he called me and told me that he is no going to marry me that he has a woman that he is so much in love with i cried, my friend told me about this man i felt it was scan until i give it a try and he help me now we are married and we are especting our baby soon, i will advise if you have any problem contact this man. prophetjakula@gmail.com

  7. Wow! As I was skimming through everyone’s stories I felt like I was reading about me. It’s amazing how many scorpio men are alike.

    Anyways, here’s my 5 cents.

    I too am in a very similar situation. Everything that was written above sounds all too familiar.
    I would suggest for any woman dating a non-committal scorpion to live for yourself and stop catering to your Scorpio.
    Don’t make the Scorpio your main source of happiness, we hate that (at least I do), it’s exhausting and a deal breaker.

    Do what you would normally do irrespective of how the Scorpio makes you feel. Don’t lose/forget who you are.

    We scorpions know already that all you women are important in our lives. We do truly care for you. Unfortunately, we’re indecisive and stubborn.

    • Stinger Male,

      Yes you all are stubborn and indecisive lol. It takes a patient and special kind of woman to deal with Scorpio men. After a little over 2yrs my Scorpio man has finally seen the light in me. We are joyful and happy with each other spiritually, mentally, and physically. :-)

  8. I have been in a relationship with a scorpio guy(14 nov) for almost 4 to 5 months. He was serious with and would ignore all the other girls for me. The problem started when due to some family reasons i couldnt meet him or talk to him..talking or meeting him was possible only once or twice in a month.. He understands me, he knows that iam true with him and iam not cheating or lieing coz i have passed every single test that he kept on me. I had gained his trust but than he got in a relation with other girl and i came to know this..i called him several times but he dint reply than finally he attended my call..he thought i would scold him but he was quite emotional when he heard me crying on the phone…he insisted me not to cry..we talked everything was normal that day..but the next day when i called him he did not reply even till today we dint talk for once..than i came to know he is in other relation with a girl and she is a scorpio..he has uploaded her photo in her account it seems that he is very serious with her..now i created a problem recently in may..which led to serious questioning of police to my guy..after that he very angry on me..now what should i do i want him back in my life..i miss him its been 6 months that we dint talk..:'(. .i am a pisces girl born on 8 mar.

    • Hi Danushi,

      Have you tried reaching out to him during those six months of you all not speaking? If you have and he hasnt responded, you need to just let go. If he truly wants to be with you or mend you alls relationship he will reach out to you. Scorpios do things when they want to do them, not when someone tells them or nags them or tries to manipulate them into doing something. Unfortunately it is no longer on you, he already knows you want him, the question is does he want you. Now if you havnt tried to reach out to him, then send him a simple message asking him hows he doing, and see if he responds. If he responds then, allow him to guide the conversation, you just keep it simple.

  9. I am Gemini, i became friends with a married Scorpio man about a year ago when I was going through some problems with my boyfriend. And although I promised myself I would never have an affair with a married man about 3 months later we were having sex. It is the best sex I ever had. A day couldn’t pass without us talking. We told each other everything. Initially We would always confess our love for each other. He indicated to me several times if he ever find out of me and any other man he would leave me. Recently i v been questioning him about another female friend of his and when he asked me why I keep asking about her I kinda lost it and snapped. I told him i met he and her as friends and he is not my husband, he is not my man so if he choose to f@#k other people it comes back to the same thing. And asked why should I bitch about it. This conversation took place over black berry messenger.
    When I tries to apologise to him the next morning I realize he had deleted me. So I sent the apology on whatsapp to which he did not respond. I tried calling him to tell him we should talk. But his response has been very cold. Its obvious I have hurt him and he don’t wish to see me bir speak to me. I love him so much even though he is married. How can I get him back. Please help

  10. Sorry Nicole for posting to your reply accidentally.

    • Hey Jem,

      No problem with posting to my reply, its ok. My advice to you is let him go, more than likely you twos relationship was temporary anyway. He has no respect for you, his wife, and himself. You should not have apologized to this married man, you dont owe him anything. So, if you want something better and that you can call your own, leave him alone. Trust me its not worth your sanity, he sounds controlling and manipulative. He’s an unevolved Scorpio, and these Scorpios are nothing nice. Once you exposed your weakness (which was falling for him knowing he is married), and from what you have shared in your post, he hasnt showed any signs of leaving his wife, you can forget about him ever taking you seriously.

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